Hook, Line, and Stinker
Asides
A Non-Nietzschian Abyss
Modern customer support is like a Non-Nietzschian abyss. You gaze into it… nothing gazes back.
Break even
First, they broke down. Then they broke up. Now they break even.
Facebook Conversations
There are those people on Facebook with whom you have conversations that seem to go along this line:
A: Since most bananas are yellow and bent…
B: They are red.
A: No bananas are mostly yellow and bent… some are green… and they can turn dark brown and can be almost straight… but most are yellow and bent…
B: Apples are red.
A: I’m discussing bananas. And they are mostly yellow and bent.
B: No they are not. They are apples and they are red.
A: …
Hold your breath forever
“If any person can show just cause as to why these two may not be joined together let them speak now or forever hold their breath…”
“Ahem. I feel I have to speak… out of self-preservation…”
Sweet Baby Jesus
“Oh, Sweet Baby Jesus!”
“You’re wrong… human flesh does not taste sweet at all… it’s more of a papery texture with a definite undertone of red wine…”
When pressing enter, move the selection… upwards?!
At first, I thought this was a sign of a Microsoft programmer with too much time on their hands, but then I realized that of course, in Australia, where they are upside down, they need the selection to move upwards when pressing enter!
And left/right is for places where everything is politicized… “No communist/fascist selections in my home!”
Hard drive blast radius
I just installed a new hard drive in my NAS. It makes sounds that suggest I should stay clear of the blast radius when it breaks down…
Header image: By © Raimond Spekking / CC BY-SA 4.0, Link
The children will NOT save the world
Grownups are always talking about how the children will save the world. The only reason children don’t question that they are pinning their hopes on someone that isn’t even allowed to vote is likely because they are children… and possibly one or two among them are shrewd enough to realize that if they just nod in agreement, once they grow up they can pull the same fast one with their own children and then live their lives as they see fit with no regards to the future…
Time flies
What time is it right now? Half-past…
FUCK!
Time flies will eat your life… alive… and to death… Horrendous creatures!
Talkwards 