Sometimes I wonder what is truer; that power corrupts or that power attracts corrupt people…
Asides
A Disgusting Person
“What did the polygraph said?”
“Either he’s lying, or he had to fart a lot.”
“Huh?”
“Yeah… The polygraph can tell us if they need to fart or if they are lying, but we haven’t figured out yet how to distinguish between the two…”
“Either way, he’s a disgusting person. Let’s lock him up.”
“Either he’s lying, or he had to fart a lot.”
“Huh?”
“Yeah… The polygraph can tell us if they need to fart or if they are lying, but we haven’t figured out yet how to distinguish between the two…”
“Either way, he’s a disgusting person. Let’s lock him up.”
Human Sacrifice
God: What? Human sacrifices? Again? Hmmm… Listen… just as long as you clean up after yourselves… I don’t want to slip on pools of blood. Ok? Good. Now, shoo!
Something I Missed
Oh right! I was supposed to go to bed… eight hours ago… I knew there was something I missed!
The Den of Thieves, Grifters, and Con-artists
“I’m visiting the den of thieves, grifters, and con-artists! Wish me luck!”
“Didn’t you visit the tax authorities last week?”
“Didn’t you visit the tax authorities last week?”
Meteorologists catching up
Meteorologists are catching up with the rest of the world and realizing 2020 isn’t just a mess… it’s a hot mess…. in fact, probably the hottest mess ever.
The Greater Good
People who speak of the greater good are usually those whose accomplishments in the area of great goodness are rather inadequate.
Children of God
Humanity: We’re the crown of God’s creation! We’re the children of God!
God: Eh… Right… I guess technically… Yeah, sure… you could say you’re my children… (Redheaded stepchildren…)
Humanity: Yay! We rock!
God: Sure, sure. Now go play civilization with the other sentient species… daddy is busy!
Humanity: WHAT!?!?! Waaaaaaahhhh!
God: Fiddlesticks!
Goddess: What did you do?!?
God: I told humanity about other sentient species…
Goddess sighs: We agreed to wait till they got older!
God: Sorry.
Goddess: My poor babies! Come to mama!
God: Eh… Right… I guess technically… Yeah, sure… you could say you’re my children… (Redheaded stepchildren…)
Humanity: Yay! We rock!
God: Sure, sure. Now go play civilization with the other sentient species… daddy is busy!
Humanity: WHAT!?!?! Waaaaaaahhhh!
God: Fiddlesticks!
Goddess: What did you do?!?
God: I told humanity about other sentient species…
Goddess sighs: We agreed to wait till they got older!
God: Sorry.
Goddess: My poor babies! Come to mama!
Romantic Feminism
“Feminism? Isn’t that the thing that killed romance?”
“It killed old-school romance… proudly!”
“It killed old-school romance… proudly!”
Extend Boolean
I need to extend Boolean but it doesn’t work! What the hell is wrong with you people? The world isn’t black and white! I need more than true and false!
