This bottle of red rum is a rellik. It’s a bouquet to die for!
Tag Archives: Puns
Subconscious Unconscious
As a submariner I’m always subconscious at work… however, I also get a lot of help from my unconscious.
Going off on a Tangent
I tried to learn the piano but had to quit since I kept going off on a tangent…
Flair for the Dramatic
“Why the hell did you shoot a flare into the gas tank?”
“I had a flare for the dramatic…”
“I had a flare for the dramatic…”
Perfect Pasta
Perfect Pasta: Deus ex Macaroni…
Veganism
Veganism: No harm, no fowl.
Make a Wish
“Hey, what happened? Did you fall into the lake?”
“I hate my parents…”
“Why?”
“Make a wish my boyfriend said, and when I did he threw me into a well…”
“That’s horrible! But how is it your parent’s fault…?”
“I know I shouldn’t date idiots, but still… if they hadn’t named me Penny…”
Dramatic Kitchen Utensils
Yesterday my girlfriend and I were spooning, but her brother’s girlfriend kinda forked in. Which unfortunately made her brother come at us with a knife. I decided my plate was full, and to not stir the pot anymore I excused myself…
Chopping
“Where did the ax murderer go?”
“He went out to do some chopping…”
“He went out to do some chopping…”
Elf Scent
“The currency of my fantasy world is the Elf Dollar. It can be divided into Elf Cents…”
“Elf scent? Who’d pay to sniff an elf?”
“Elf scent? Who’d pay to sniff an elf?”
