You’re really asking where the aliens are? Have you not seen how humans treat aliens? They for sure have…
Category Archives: Humor
Well fun stuff (I hope), programming humor, word puns, etc.
Swedish Apple Spell
How Swedish spell checking in Apple Spell apparently was created:
Apple: Give us a list of correctly spelled Swedish words.
Swedish language professor: What do you need it for?
Apple: We’re doing spell checking.
Professor: Oh, you can’t do it like that.
Apple: We’re Apple! We can do anything!
Professor (making a joke list): Here, make spell checking with this.
Apple Spell just marked “spådan” (a misspelled “sådan”) a correct word in Swedish.
I mean. Sure, it is a correct Swedish word (a compound of “spå”—fortune-telling, and “dan”—the day… so, “the fortune-telling day”).
I tried to Google it, but was unable. It defaulted to “spådam” (fortune-teller) which ever way I tried to make it not. (Coincidentally, this is also a compound of “spå” and “dam”—lady… Swedish do compounds galore!)
What pisses me off most is that this ungoogleable compound exists in this shit spell checking but not some very very very common ones, like:
- Lättstörd—easily disturbed (e.g. sleep)
- Maglevtåg—maglev train
- Obäddad—unmade (bed)
- Prästinnorna—the priestesses
- And several thousand other words that are not conlang words I have in my local dictionary (currently at 3536 words… I may be a prolific conlanger… but no, not that prolific)
That’s why I think Apple Spell is the result of a Swedish language professor jokingly showing Apple that, no, you can’t do anything even if you think so.
And no, I know what you think. Why don’t you install a Hunspell dictionary? WHY DON’T YOU TRY TO INSTALL ONE? You’d be one of a handful having tried and failed, and none of those people work at Apple.
Microsoft Word may not be good for much when it comes to fiction writing, but it does do Swedish spell-checking about a million times better than Apple Spell.
Scarier than dead bodies
“Oh God! You scared me.”
“Really? You work with dead bodies all day.”
“So if something moves, it’s likely a dead body.”
“Really? Does that happen often?”
“Did my reaction gave you that impression?”
Stumble and fall
It’s easy to stumble and fall if everything is swept under the rug…
Rumor-based reality perception
“Does he really believe those strange and bizarre things?”
“He has a rumor-based reality perception… so, yeah…”
Executive Crayon
Why is Trump signing his orders with a Sharpie?
Because they felt the crayon wasn’t presidential enough…
The US attacking NATO
Wonder what USA attacking NATO over Greenland would look like? Pretty much like this:
The rest of the world likely gets to play the role of the boss…
Conspiracy Theory 101
Conspiracy theory 101:
- Come up with an outrageous conspiracy theory
(If you’re unable, there are a thousand-and-one online resources of the social variety to help you out) - Tell it to everyone
- When someone gets shocked, concerned or upset, take it as a “proof” they are in on it…
- Jump back to step 1 to double down…
Trump, the Father of Lies?
So, you feel Trump is like one of the characters in the Bible? I agree. He does lie a lot. And isn’t there a passage about the Devil being charming as hell and leading many astray? Yeah, the charm was before the election. Now you’re in the domain of the Father of Lies…..
Customer Service Success
Boss: It seems the new AI-powered customer service function is a success… people are actually upset when we step in to do some human interaction.
Programmer: We know, it’s a problem we’re trying to solve.
Boss: What? That they like to talk to the AI? Why would we want them not to?
Programmer: We based it off of a sex bot…