In Cannes, partying with Daniel Craig and Lindsay Lohan. Their faces are huge. He looks a bit old and she looks a bit over the top with her make-up, but hey! They are great drinking buddies!

“Cool,” I say, “that music sounds just like my alarm clock.”

Daniel fades.

“It’s your call,” Lindsay says.

“Fuck!” I say and wake up.

Humor, Politics and Society

Modern Apology

Aside Sat, Jan 7, 2017 erk Leave a comment

Modern apology: “I’m afraid that there is such a rich thesaurus now of things that I have said that have been one way or another, through what alchemy I do not know, somehow misconstrued that it would really take me too long to engage in a fully global itinerary of apology to all concerned.”

/Britain’s Foreign Secretary Boris Johnson

Humor, Science and Technology

Catastrophe Alarm the Samsung Way

Tue, Jan 3, 2017 erk Leave a comment

So, I’m on the phone and it starts vibrating worse than ever, and I’m like: WTF? No indications or “popups” or whatever.

Then when I’m done talking the phone vibrates again, this time accompanied by the patented “worst ringtone ever”:

This time when I check the phone it turns out the Samsung Zone Alarm is warning about “ice and snow” in Stockholm.

That’s great to know, but seriously… THAT RINGTONE?

I mean imagine, people in floods, hurricanes, earthquakes, and storms hearing THAT RINGTONE? Can you sue for psychological damage?

Ok. Snow storms in Sweden are OK if you keep off the roads and you don’t have the bad luck to get hit by something like “Gudrun,” that may, in fact, bring you off the power grid for a couple of weeks (if you live in the more rural parts of Sweden…)

Cover image: By Dave Harlow, USGS – CVO Photo Archives – Pinatubo, Philippines, Public Domain, Link

Humor