Why mankind is going to hell via internet:
A: This is a picture of a fish, it clearly have fins!
B: Giraffes don’t have fins!
A: It’s a picture of a fish!
B: What’s fishes got to do with anything?
A: They have fins.
B: Giraffes don’t.
A: We’re talking about fish.
B: Giraffes don’t have fins!
A: Right Giraffes don’t have fins.
B: See, I’m right…
A: Yes with regards to giraffes…
B: …fishes don’t have fins.
A: I give up.
B: I’m so cool! I’m so right! I’m so hot! I’m so bright! I’m so yeah oh yeah!
We’re implementing CI/CD in my current project… you know; Continuous Irritation / Continuous Disappointment…
Volatile AtomicIntegers… what could possibly go wrong?
“Did you kidnap this girl?”
“No!”
“You didn’t even look at the picture!”
“I’m not saying no to the girl, I’m saying no to the whole concept of kidnapping!”
Paraphrased from “Magnum P.I. (2018)”
A: I don’t know if he’s insisting, pontificating, or stipulating. Maybe I should use all three with slashes in between?
B: Did he use words?
A: Sure, but…
B: Then he “says.”
He was born in evil-hundred and two…
“Let ‘snot go there,” he snorted.
Write because you have something important to say.
If you don’t have something important to say, find something that upsets you, engages you, or otherwise feels important to you. Read about it and talk about it with people that know about it until it feels like something important you must say something about.
If you do this you’ll feel a need to write even on days when you’re not inspired. If your message is important enough, you might be able to not just finish the first draft, but also edit it into something publishable.
If, on the other hand, you write because you love language and you feel sexy whenever you use complicated words and craft impressive, long sentences, if you want to show people, especially the opposite sex how smart and irresistable you are by using language, the risk is high that you only end up showing your reader…
…that you have fallen victim to a perverted pursuit of style…
If you write because you have something important to say you’ll feel a need to write even on days when you’re not inspired.
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Header image: By Patrick Denker, Flickr, Link (Edited)
A: Now that I’m in the movies I need you all to call me by my actor name.
B: Sure, I’m just not sure if your first name is Rock or Hard…
If you design a program to be so easy even an idiot can use it… idiots will use it… and if you’re aggressive enough with that design choice, finally only idiots will be able to use it.
Talkwards 