Category Archives: Humor

Well fun stuff (I hope), programming humor, word puns, etc.

41 Active Visitors from ISS – The sharpest minds read Talkwards!

41 active visitors from International Space Station
Fresh off Google Analytics: 41 active visitors from International Space Station

See for yourselves on the right. (You may have to click on the image to read it… unless you have super vision?)

41 visitors from ISS (The International Space Station)!

Now, given my usual visit stats… this means a majority of my visitors come from ISS! Woh! So, only the worlds sharpest minds read my blog.

But wait?! How many people are there up there actually? 41 active visitors… that must be one crowded control room!

Checking the net tells me there’s only 6 people up there… guys! did you start an ISP?!

Another nagging problem is… the big fat zero up in the top left side of the image…

Can this be a bug? Nah! The zero must be the bug and I am sure those six astronauts are like super smart and obviously they have several browsers going at once… I mean, they need to get all articles quick? Right?

So, Hi to you ISS personnel up there! I hope you enjoy my blog! 😀

Oh, if you’re wondering how all this happened, it’s hardly the most amazing thing to happen today:

April fools! 🙂

BoRG 13 billion light years away: Invasion possibly canceled!

BORG Collective
BORG Collective, By Eddi van W.

The BoRG are 13 billion light years away! Hope is not lost!

I found this information while I was browsing the astronomy pages on Wikipedia (more common than my geek factor can really tolerate, but still) and I came across a list (see below) of the most distant astronomical objects (notice object 8 – with a red frame?).

As far as I can tell from the list, the “BoRG-58” (shown with red frame) is somewhere between 13 and 13.025 Gly away (that’s billions of light years). I’ve understood the “z” stands for red shift, however, part from that, I’m just guessing here.

List of the most distant astronomical objects, where "BoRG-58" (a Protocluster candidate) has a distance of z≅8 (approx some 13Gly)
List of the most distant astronomical objects, source Wikipedia

Anyhow, we need not fear! There are no direct risk of getting across the BoRG in our lifetime… assimilation has been cancelled… the BoRG are so far away it’s silly… I mean travelling at warp 9.9 it would take them 13.4 million years to get here… But since they travel at transwarp speeds I can only assume they’d be here far sooner… (Frantic Googling did not yield a good calculation for transwarp speeds… I’m guessing the federation doesn’t know them – transwarp speeds that is – and I’d have to guess… further that it would have to be BoRG transwarp speeds as well… any transwarp speed would not do here!)

Ah well… life is full of uncertainty… Perhaps we’ll be assimilated in time for the next ice age?

But wait… BoRG-58?! Where the hell are the other 57 BoRGs? Shit! DAmn! CraP!

Update from my doctor:

  1. They are called “BORG” not “BoRG”
  2. They do not exist
  3. You always get like this when you live life with your imagination dialled all the way up to “too vivid to handle”!
  4. Eat your meds and call me in the morning…

Update 2:

Mom, this is a joke! Calm down!

I know the BORG is not really for real… At least I think they’re not really for real… did anyone came across any BORG? I may have… I especially remember one girlfriend…

OK, never mind that…

Game of Fuckin’ Thrones!

Some of the more engaged fans have made a pretty good interpretation of the Game of Thrones intro/theme…

It made me laugh!

On a more serious note… hurry enjoying this clip… it will most likely be removed by the people owning the Game of Thrones trademark (yeah, the ones that doesn’t understand the modern media culture and doesn’t appreciate how much of a boost these kind of “pranks” are to their trademark…)