Defining/scary moments in life:
- The first time you realize mom and dad don’t have all the answers.
- The first time you realize your doctor doesn’t have all the answers.
- The first time you realize there are questions that have no answers.
Defining/scary moments in life:
– Will this ever fucking end?
– It’s called life, and it always ends.
Unwillingness to understand must be one of the shortest paths to idiocy…
Positive thinking: One good thing about a nuclear war is that perishable goods would most likely have their due dates pushed several weeks into the “future.”
– Have you noticed many TV-shows are trying to revive the 80ies?
– Yeah. Have you noticed many politicians are trying to revive the 30ies?
Update: Apparently, it’s not only the politicians that are trying to reinvent the 30ies. They do it while beeing cheered on by the “voters.”
Tip to frequent flyers:
You may have flown with this aircraft a hundred—perhaps a thousand—times but I know for a fact that you have not been in an accident with it that many times…
What does a clock do when it’s hungry?
It goes back four seconds.
I’m sure Donald Trump is doing his very best… that’s why I sincerely hope he won’t become the next American president.
Update: Woahahahahaha!!!
Prosecutor: So, you never heard the defendant say he was planning the murder?
Witness: No.
Prosecutor: As far as you know?
Witness: No.
Prosecutor: No?
Witness: I also know things I don’t know…
Prosecutor: What?!
Witness: It’s my super power… of course it’s as far as I know… Captain Obvious!
Judge: Order!
“At the end of the day, I’m not the president of the United States.”
/Designated Survivor
Right… Or actually; WRONG!