Lawyer: We intend to prove our client had no knowledge of the sort.
Prosecutor: We have definite proof the defendant had intimate knowledge of the so called Sort!
Judge: Well, we’re here to sort this out.
Journalist: Judge in Sorting Case just Sorted!
Category Archives: Humor
Well fun stuff (I hope), programming humor, word puns, etc.
The Ritual Magic of IT Project Estimation
Black Underwear Event
“I’m having a party this weekend. I’ll invite you if you promise to behave.”
“Hah! What’s the dress code?”
“It’s a black underwear event…”
If a tree falls in the forest
A: If a tree falls in the forest and no one is there to listen…
B: You’ve apparently never been in a forest…
A: Huh?
B: There’s always someone that can listen… or something…
We don’t like your opinions
Your facts are opinions and we don’t like your opinions…
Giraffes don’t have fins
Why mankind is going to hell via internet:
A: This is a picture of a fish, it clearly have fins!
B: Giraffes don’t have fins!
A: It’s a picture of a fish!
B: What’s fishes got to do with anything?
A: They have fins.
B: Giraffes don’t.
A: We’re talking about fish.
B: Giraffes don’t have fins!
A: Right Giraffes don’t have fins.
B: See, I’m right…
A: Yes with regards to giraffes…
B: …fishes don’t have fins.
A: I give up.
B: I’m so cool! I’m so right! I’m so hot! I’m so bright! I’m so yeah oh yeah!
CI/CD
We’re implementing CI/CD in my current project… you know; Continuous Irritation / Continuous Disappointment…
Volatile AtomicInteger
Volatile AtomicIntegers… what could possibly go wrong?
Saying no to the whole concept of kidnapping
“Did you kidnap this girl?”
“No!”
“You didn’t even look at the picture!”
“I’m not saying no to the girl, I’m saying no to the whole concept of kidnapping!”
Paraphrased from “Magnum P.I. (2018)”
He says
A: I don’t know if he’s insisting, pontificating, or stipulating. Maybe I should use all three with slashes in between?
B: Did he use words?
A: Sure, but…
B: Then he “says.”
Talkwards 