Official: Our thoughts and prayers today are with the people…
The People: Phew! We’re saved! The politicians will start thinking from now on…

Official: Our thoughts and prayers today are with the people…
The People: What thoughts are that specifically? Because it seems there haven’t been many thoughts up to this point…

Official: Our thoughts and…
The People: BOOO!

Official: Listen… I’m not gonna say I’m sorry… but I’m thinking about it… it’s just… you know… when there are lots of guns in a place… things are bound to happen… And prayers won’t help but it’s always nice to feel you’re doing something…