Eaten by a grue

You are likely to be eaten by a grue.

You are likely to be greeted by a gnu.

You are likely to be treated by a flu.

You are likely to be tested by a clue.

You are likely to be nestled in a stew,

You are likely to be sent off to Peru.

You are likely unlikely… unless unlikely likely… statistically speaking.

Will Donald Trump End the World?

Well, I think we’re dealing with two possible scenarios here:

  1. When Trump gets to the point where he’s about to start World War 3 the US senate will kick him out on his butt with a vote of no confidence.
  2. Donald Trump is the leader of an evil alien invasion and the whole senate has been body snatched and they will placidly vote “yes” to anything he says. (This is an alternative fact).

I guess time will tell which one it is… (So far the jury leans towards case 2… oh, and the people that voted for Trump… this can be explained with mind controlling substances in the drinking water, more body snatching and, of course, chemtrails!)

Update: Given the current situation in the White House two alternative scenarios are rising stars on the horizon:

  1. Donald Trump will accidentally sit on the Football and start WW III.
  2. The Football will be stolen during a demonstration on a strip club and used to start the third world war. There’s also an alternative 4b where Donald Trump accidentally starts world war three while demonstrating the Football on a strip club.

Update 2: Of course he won’t end the world by doing something as silly as fumbling with the Football… he’s already started it on twitter